‘…I thought I would try and ‘own it’ by pretending I was a super-cool, famous blogger…Don’t think I could have looked more of a tw*t if I tried…’
Saturday 18th March 2017
Saturday just gone was another fail, although I didn’t help myself by getting in touch with people at midday to see if they wanted to go for brunch an hour ago.
Anyway, by this time I’m dressed and ready to go and even though I have absolutely no idea where that would be, I just leave the house. Every time. Even though I have just been fannying around for the last 4 hours, I feel that I absolutely cannot waste another moment inside even to check where it is I plan to spend my afternoon.
However, I do have a 10 minute walk to the tube to make that decision. The only thing is I have recently started helping out with the social media for my Boss’s hotel in Jamaica and basically (as my old housemate would say) I am a massive whore for Likes.
So I’m on the tube now which means Federation, my go-to coffee hotspot, is no longer an option. I also don’t really fancy changing trains. This is good, I’m narrowing it down.
I should probably let you know that I am dressed in black jeans and jumper, obvs (always bloody black on black on black. Must sort my wardrobe/life out), and wearing my trendy black and white Adidas trainers. All this AND my Rains backpack, I could not look more hipster if I tried. That’s a lie. A push scooter would be even cooler. Before its cool.
I got off at Oxford Circus; being within walking distance to Soho you can’t go wrong and anyway, if I got really stuck I would just default to Ham Yard Hotel.
I still haven’t found thee place yet, but every time I have a weekend like this I imagine the perfect café/restaurant to be bright with natural light, warm, comfortable, not too noisy or quiet, busy, with a view and not too small. Apparently, this is too much to ask.
Although, Petersham Nurseries is on my to-do list and could very well be that place, but not sure about the journey time. Hmm.
Wait. I forgot one of the most important things on my tick list. FOOD!
It must cater to all my potential hungover/lazy morning cravings. Federation does do a fab egg and avo on toast but sometimes I just need pancakes in my life. And, quite frankly, it is far too much pressure to make such an important decision before I’ve had a coffee.
I just need to find a Lime Wood in London.
Thankfully I remembered Berners Tavern, and it’s only a 4 minute walk from the tube station. Boom.
I discovered this place online recently when I was looking for places to go for my first London Brunch – I am desperately trying to start a club which is a tad tricky with 3 friends. It’s okay though, Jen has been letting me borrow hers.
FYI. Google Maps definitely doesn’t mention that the restaurant is in a hotel called The London Edition. Which is a good job because had I known beforehand I would probably have changed my mind based on the naff name.
Good news though, it’s super swanky inside and the staff are the most efficient I have experienced in ages. Before I even had time to notice it was a white tablecloth fine dining restaurant, I was already sat by the bar in a perfectly comfy armchair with a view of the restaurant, which is stunning by the way. You must visit, even if it’s just to see the décor.
This was all very exciting until I remembered what a poor man’s hipster I looked like. So, I thought I would try and ‘own it’ by pretending I was a super-cool, famous blogger by getting out my fancy new MacBook. And my notebook and pen. AND my camera.
Don’t think I could have looked more of a tw*t if I tried but hey ho, I had just found Lime Wood breakfast in London!
I ordered Earl Grey Tea to start with, which arrived in beautiful silverware and china. All I want to do forever is drink tea in posh places from a china teacup poured from a silver teapot. That’s it. I’ve decided. I’m going to be a Lady-blogger.
When I asked, the waitress kindly recommended her personal favourite which were the blueberry pancakes with honey and banana. Perfect! She was also very sweet and got the chef to put some natural yoghurt on the side for me.
I think it was when she came back to check my table and it took me five attempts to ask for more hot water for my tea, that any suspicion she may have had about me being a mystery diner were shot out the window! Will definitely make a note to order a triple espresso to start next time.
I also ordered a smoothie. I have a bit of a thing for peanut butter and banana smoothies but they only had banana and spinach. The waiter was pretty sure I would like it and arrived back at my table literally 10 seconds later with one. Nothing, especially a freshly made smoothie, should ever be served that quickly. I thought they must have had one going spare from another order but, when I had to send it back because I couldn’t stomach the after taste of the spinach, the mango smoothie arrived just as quickly.
I think, even if you are the world record holder for quickest smoothie maker, I would rather wait 5 minutes and 100% believe that you were genuinely making it to order. Anyway, they both tasted awful but that would be my only criticism from this experience.
I did have a nosey at the tables around me and the eggs on toast and other various savoury options all looked delicious with good size portions so I think this is a safe breakfast bet. Also, great place for a date if you like to splash the cash. I’m single by the way.
The other bonus about Berners, is that the brunch menu runs until 4pm and although I clearly wasn’t going to be spending a fortune the staff didn’t make me feel at all rushed or unwelcome considering I was taking up a potential table of 3 for lunch on an extremely busy Saturday. Must be that intimidating professional blogger look I had going on.
All in all I am super chuffed with this discovery and will be taking all three of my friends back for my new Brunch Club. Ooooh what about Burlgar Bessy’s Brunch Club? Too much?
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